MDE
Thursday, March 09, 2006
7:19 PM
When you look over at the empty basketball court, don't you just think that that place should be filled with you and your friends. but then you realise, that the reason why it's not that way, it cause you don't have any friends.Anyone ever notice that 'popularity' can ruin your life? that it can take away all you have. even if you never had them?. so many people strive for popularity. some try to hard. and the effect turns out the other way. i'm a living example. you try and try and try, but in the end, you're still where you began.
i think i try too hard. maybe i should stop trying. it only makes things worse. maybe i should just relax.. and just be me. but wait. this is me. strive and strive and strive to be noticed. strive and strive and strive to be popular. to be important. sometimes you strive for so long.. that.. that is you. so when you try to be 'you'. you try to be someone else.
so maybe i should try and not be myself. maybe i should change my image so i don't always seem so annoying. seem so.... strong?.
i should go join acting. since i always have to act so much. act and act and act. i'm tired of acting. but it's my lifestyle.... *groans*.
maybe i should change myself. to change who i used to be... a reason to start over new... and the reason is..
cause i suck at everything and i feel like dying.
i just have this feeling that you want to jump off a building, or dive infront of a car... i named it MDE... momentairly depression epidemic. yeah. it happens. when you feel sooo lonely. you just want to end your life. and never start again.
it sucks being me. it really does. and.. i'm not feeling very well. so i would very well apreciate if you wouldn't come and start yelling at me cause you think i'm being all 'annoying-cause-you-think-you-are-the-only-one-like-this' thing.
thanks.
K-LOVE
notsoSUNNILY and one of these days when i go berserk,
you better hope that i don't have a knife with me.